The holidays are the most wonderful time of the year. Except when they aren’t. For parents of young children, the holidays can be especially difficult, especially with children out of school, struggling with high sugar levels, later bedtimes and a lack of routine.
“It’s just crazy. It’s everyone’s voices and thoughts and there’s so much joy, but it can be a little too much, you know?” » says Meg Wallace, a mother of 7 living in San Antonio, Texas.
While many parents may feel the pressure to maximize the holidays and make “holiday magic” happen for their family and friends, family therapist Tom Kersting suggests not overdoing it.
“We must remember to try to keep some semblance of routine for our children during the holiday season,” says Kersting.
But becoming too dependent on entertaining children with electronic devices can lead to their downfall. According to the Mayo Clinic, excessive screen time can contribute to obesity, sleep problems and eye strain.
“Kids these days almost don’t know how to be bored because they are always stimulated by some device,” Kersting explains.
To avoid “Christmas grumps” or hearing the words “I’m bored” during the holidays, Wallace suggests including children in planning activities.
“We have this dream list where everyone writes down, I want to go ice skating, I want to make hot chocolate,” Wallace says.
Rather than setting specific time limits for digital media use, the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) updated its media use recommendations in 2016 to recommend considering the quality of interactions with digital media and not just quantity or duration.
“I love having a good movie night with our kids making popcorn. I love all that. But the kids get really irritable. I can see them change. Their personalities change when they’re too on screens,” Wallace says.
Dealing with anger during the holidays can also be particularly difficult, as parents can get caught up in the entertainment.
“I think as moms, it’s important to remember that anger…is always a byproduct of something else, another necessity that doesn’t have to be met,” Wallace says.
To keep it all in perspective, Kersting advises her patients to practice an attitude of gratitude.
“So instead of looking at it like I have to survive this. Think of it as a breath of fresh air, because it’s a wonderful thing,” Kersting says.
Experts also suggest parents take care of themselves during the holidays.
“The part where moms can go wrong, where we want it to be so perfect. We want everyone to be happy…it’s not about that perfection,” Wallace says. “It’s really about connecting with those you love.”
