DEAR ABBY: I live in an apartment building. I am a quiet and reserved person. There is a concierge here who is incredibly nosy. When I pick up my package, she asks me: “So, what’s in the package?” as if I’m doing something wrong. She is also a terrible gossip and a liar.
At the front desk, as well as at management, she accused me of doing things that never happened – sexual misconduct, drug and tobacco use, etc. I started receiving strange unsigned text messages with the same accusations. I can usually recognize who is contacting me. My contact information was available at the office.
This woman recently gained access to my apartment using a master key. Luckily, I was home at the time. She was fired, but she came back last weekend. Our manager said she was here “temporarily” until he could find a replacement. There are multiple copies of these keys, and I no longer feel safe in my home. What would you do if you were me? — INVADED IN GEORGIA
DEAR INVADED: Document any incidents that have occurred. If they continue, note the time and date they occurred. This will be helpful if you need to escalate the matter. The fact that the manager rehired a laid-off employee due to a staffing shortage is disappointing. (It shouldn’t have happened, and there are better ways to increase staffing needs.)
If your manager has not responded, contact the owner or management company and report what happened. If that doesn’t work, report the matter to the police. Your safety and well-being must come first.
If you can afford to hire a lawyer, consult one for advice on legal options you can consider to protect yourself from harassment, hostility or intimidation. If the situation does not improve, consider finding new accommodation.
DEAR ABBY: I am currently married but looking to get an annulment or divorce. I met a woman who I fell in love with. She knows my marital status and feels the same way about me.
I promised her that my marriage would be over within eight months, but she thinks that with my divorce, my wife should leave even if I move out and rent out my share of the house. (My soon-to-be ex and I currently live on opposite sides of the house.) Do you agree? — CHANGES IN NEW YORK
DEAR MAKE CHANGES: Whether I agree or not is irrelevant. The person who should be answering this question is the attorney who will represent you in the divorce. If you are truly considering leaving the marriage, make an appointment NOW to discuss it.
PS: And please give yourself time after the divorce is finalized rather than getting married again afterwards.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at http://www.DearAbby.com or PO Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
